BOOM
2001-06-02 4:49 a.m.

and BOOM!

bomb goes out in the middle of tel aviv, just a few miles away from here. a suicide bomber blew up in the middle of an entrance line to a local club. a bomb containting all kinds of metal objects and screws, screws which invaded all the people who happened to be there.

17 people killed, 25 fatally injured, 40 with medium injuries, 50 with light injuries.

those are the numbers. just so you have a point of reference, medium injuries usually contain loss of vital body parts, such as the beloved legs.

almost all of the injured and dead people are teenagers my age, some probably even from where i live. i just pray to god that there wasnt anyone i know there.

i was talking to my friend nir about it, saying how horrible it would be if one of the people we know was hurt in the bombing. then i said " we'll just have to hope for the best". well thats stupid. if its not someone we know, its someone somebody else knows. in a larger perspective it doesn't really matter. but i still pray i dont know personally any of the dead/injured. dont wanna deal with that.

Its all terrible. Horrible. frightening. but i'd be lying if i said it doesnt all give you some kind of adrenalin rush. its interesting, its exciting. if you asked me if i wanted the bombing to happen i would say FUCK NO!! but i cant deny having the kinda of basic instinct spring out everytime a disaster happens, like a tiger hearing a sound in the bushes, his ears erect, and his heart beats. im sure tigers love that.

ofcourse morals and human logic beat the basic instincts anytime. god so many life's ruined tonight. and the scariest thought that it could have been me. I have walked many times on friday nights near the place where the bombing happened. I could be the one feeling pain which cant be put into words, screaming and shouting, only to wake up the day after in a hospital seeing i have no arms. FOR CRYING OUT LOUD!! GOD HAVE MERCY!!!!

and ofcourse my prime minister sharon will have to make such a giant attack now on the palestinians to please the public opinion here in israel. and my basic instinct again is saying : " REVENGE, BOMB THEM, KILL THEM, LET THEM FEEL OUR WRATH". but then my logic tells me : " NO THAT WOULD ONLY CAUSE MORE DEATHES ON EACH SIDE, AND SHATTERED FAMILIES THERE ARE NO BETTER THAN SHATTERED FAMILIES HERE".

but what does it matter i dont make the decisions. sharon will bomb the palestinians, killing probably a 100 people in the next couple of days. maybe tonight is the night that will trigger war. who knows. lets hope for the best.

and SHUT - UP, basic instinct!! i dont want war!!! you hear me?? that will help no one!!!.

sigh. i have so much to say on every single thing regarding this, maybe its better i write a doctorate and not a diary entry.......

quote of the day "fuck the middle east".

i once searched napster for songs regarding the middle east, and found the hard metal (i think) song called "fuck the middle east". well from kinda of a different point of view than the american hard rock band singer, i agree.