synopsis of portugal
2001-06-29 5:31 a.m.

first day

went to airport. wasted 2 hours on wrong lines. took the plane to zurich. changed planes in zurich. took the plane to lisbon, heard pixies on plane. met my mother there at about 10 p.m. went with her to restaurant, then to hotel room took bath. slept.

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day 2

woke up. ate hotel breakfast. went with mom to lisbon center. nice place but not great. bought pants and swimming pants. got offered like 5 times hasish walking down the central avenue. do i look like a drug addict or something??? went with mom to lisbon castle. nice view i guess.

thoughts - "god, walking around with my mom is sooooo exhausting. she annoys me soooooooooo. and she makes me feel shitty bout myself, brings me back to stupid struggles."

ate at restaurant. got drunk a bit and let my mom see a side of me she doesnt know - i told her i wont fit in in the army, and she asked why, and i said cause im an outsider, and she said "really? i didnt know that bout you". ahhhhhhm.

went to hotel room. browsing through the channels on tv, getting by chance to the "pay per view" porno channel. mom telling me she watched the channel a day ago, but then stopped when she realised it'll show up on the billing when she has to pay.

thoughts - " mom , PLEASE dont watch porn, for my mental well being..... and IF you do, please dont tell me about it, okay? for my mental well being...... "

heh.

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day 3

ate hotel breakfast. took the underground to the biggest shopping mall in europe with mom. bought nice shirt. then took the underground to another part of lisbon. went with her to a 15'th century monastery, and walked around all day. still annoyed by mom but getting used to her somehow. we ate at this really really pricey restaurant with really really DISGUSTING food.

thoughts - "i cant believe we're paying this much for some rotten fish they heated in a microwave. i know what i should do - i should get up, start screaming, throwing and breaking stuff......"

i did nothing though. :)

went to hotel room. took bath. slept.

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day 4

mom going to work, so im all alone in lisbon. excited and a bit scared about it. take the underground to the zoo area. enter zoo.

thoughts - " damnit why out of all the places did i decide to go to place in which they store wild animals in small cages? do i have NO morals at all???? damnit. "

experienced half an hour of guilt, muttering - "im sorry" to animals. the guilt was afterwards replaced by fun, enjoying the interesting animals. stupid me. but decided not to go to a zoo ever again. i probably wont stick with it though.

walked around to a palace the tourguide said was really nice. surprise surpise it was closed when i got there - so i walked around the giant secluded park near it for some hours. sat between the trees, heard bjork. then got a bit lost, but found my way back eventually. took underground to hotel. got burned as hell from the sun - i was too lazy to put sunscreen on. waited for my mother to come back from work. took bath and kept on reading "the great gatsby". well i have to read it dont i ??? hehehehe.

then went with mom and one of her colleagues to dinner. went to hotel room. and slept.

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day 5.

mom working so all alone again. managed to take the right train to a town an hour away from lisbon called sintra. arrived there - a place close to heaven - beautifull gardens everywhere, palaces of kings with majestic rooms, and views undescribable. enjoying myself very much. spent all day there.

heard cocteau at top of the world and......... fucked god. ( explanation tommarow )

got a bit lost in the magnificent vast forest, but got back alright to train station. after taking train got to hotel room. met mom. went to restaurant. back to hotel room. slept.

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day 6

mom working half day until flight. taking the underground to the riverside in lisbon. walking around there. going to top of tower seeing view. then going to oceanrium - this giant aquarium with everykind of fish possible. very nice. walking around some more. hearing patti smith. going to meet mom and then to airport, taking plane to brussels and then to tel aviv.

arriving home, writing last day's diary entry, getting ready to go to sleep at 6 a.m. when ehud asks me if i wanna walk around with him and moran. (friends). so i did. and since then ive been up and about all day except for only 3 hours or so of sleeping. so i REALLY REALLY need to sleep.... and its 6 a.m. again and i have to wake up soon. sigh.

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sorry if the description of the trip wasnt really thorough and well written :) there are so many things i can say about it but im too tired now. all in all it was fun. but now i need to get on with life. hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. and problems are already popping up like flowers after rain. they always do.

quote of the day "im not happy and im not sad".

just tired. eyelids closing involuntarily....