WISH ME LUCK PLEASE. TOMMAROW I'M A SOLDIER DAMNIT!!
2002-04-06 11:57 p.m.

i was planning on writing a really big entry. finishing this era. saying how this diary was one of the things that originally started the whole change in me this last year, a change for the best. growth. i guess. this was probably the most influencive thing on my life. i can't thank you enough diary. i can't thank you enough. and really it's me i'm thanking but hey that's a bit too vain. well actually i'm thanking you too. thank you.

i meant to do some recap of all the diaries past happenings, a recap of the most exciting year yet in my life. i meant to say how i don't regret nothing. not gatsby not this diary not katrijn not my job not my friends not anything. ANYTHING. sure i made some silly decisions, but i don't regret a thing. NOTHING.

no recap.

i shaved my head today. and my beard. the beard which started with this diary and ended now. oh dear. my hair. oh dear oh dear. i love my hair more than anything in my body. one of the single things i'm totally happy about. but now almost no hair. and no beard. oh well.

just going to sleep. and waking up tommarow.

i have 6 hours and 24 minutes.

today i could hardly breath. each thought about the army made my heart stop. i can't breath. but i'll try to get some sleep.

sleep. and waking up. and the army. and stuff. my next entry will be in 1 - 12 days. you can never know anything with this army.

wish me luck won't you?

it'll be alright.

it's all a big game anyway isn't it? it is.