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me admire life i admire life. (thoughts about how i'm a fuck up and loss of hope and suicide toss through my head more frequently then my numerous thoughts about world suffering but my admiration for life is stronger then a many things) (thinking about suicide is like a snack though. never have i really meant it. it kinda of makes me cynically laugh if you know what i mean) i read an article not a long time ago about a gay couple who are artists wand made their home a museum and they don't treat art as art they treat life as art. they breath art in everything they do. they dress the same way talk the same way dye their blond freaky hair the same way and make everything they do be out of the ordinary. i'm not sure if that's plain bullshit or my new destination in life. i might live art to someday. hee hee. i never really meant to mention the word suicide my cute little bunnies. i'm sorry if i frightened you. hush hush. don't worry. for the matter of fact i'm quite content and happy now. or something close to it. maybe temporal serenity (are the sound waves coming out of my stereo the cause of it or just the stimulator for it?) when i say little bunnies i imagine a whole fleet of thousands of cute little furry white animals jumping around vast green sunny fields of grass. they jump and they are jolly and they have yellow and red and purple flowers. and when i finish this entry they will take a break from their jumping and they will have a confrence and the headmaster bunny (whatever) will read my entry out loud and all my little bunnies will be hypnotized by my words read out loud and they will love me and i will love them. and they will understand what i mean and they will cheer and they hold their fingers for me and they will keep on jumping merrily and happily until i write another entry. yes that's how it is. |